Now Entering Adulthood

May 30, 2008 at 3:39 pm Leave a comment

I guess I’ve technically been an adult for some 4 odd years now, but I’m starting the count as of last Monday when I began my first full time job. I’ve got to say, I now see why everyone is ready to settle down at this point.

I cannot physically stay up past 11:30.

I get pleasure out of tidying my room every night and preparing for the day ahead.

The top of drawer my desk at work contains chapstick, hand lotion, a wide array of snacks, and my badge. It’s only a matter of time before these make an appearance:

candy

Figure 1: Shit, now that I think about it, I could go for some sugar free hard candy right about now.

Basically, I am a boring sack of potatoes. Well, a lean mean eatin-my-greens boring sack of potatoes. You know how domesticated hogs are just a few days away from turning into crazy ass feral hogzillas? Oh, you didn’t? Well shit!

hogzilla

Figure 2: I digress because I care.

Anyway, my evolution has been much the opposite from that of our dear friend pictured above. A month ago I was running wild, subsisting on a diet consisting entirely of nachos, beer, and liquor. This was not good.

Figure 3: Yes, we are eating nacho cheese.

My feral days are over, now on to Grown and Sexy. Basically I’ve gone from the above:

to this:

Ok, ok so I\'m still working on the sexy part.

Figure 4: Ok ok, still working on the sexy part.

Of course, I will miss my sabertooth buddies and the loin cloth get up was a lot more practical for the summer months, but every change has its drawbacks.

All in all I’m enjoying my newfound lameness. However, if I ever utter “early bird special” and “K&W” in the same breath, please start force feeding me tequila shots till I come to my senses…or black out…

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An historic event Fork and Run

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